Mr. Coughanhack in 8C

I’ve been trying to “follow through” with those promptings you get, you know, “You should really send her flowers,” or “they need a note of encouragement.” Those times when you get the impression to write a note or send a word of encouragement or a Thank You card. I am so bad about doing that kind of thing, I have good intentions, I buy the beautiful cards, and I love writing them and the feeling that I get when I do it, but for some reason, I forget.

This morning as I wake up to a stuffed up head so bad that I can’t blow my nose; while Bear is sleeping sitting up with a spit bottle to catch the drainage, I am prompted to send a thank you. Here goes:

Mr. Coughanhack in row 8, seat C; United airlines, flight XX22, from Chicago to Seatac,

I just wanted to thank you for your cold, which you so generously shared with us. I realize that they are “common” so they occur everywhere, but you were generous enough to make sure that we caught yours. Thank you for hacking so effectively that your germs spread far and wide across the airplane, especially to the sleeping couple in the row directly in front of you. We couldn’t have gotten this sick without you.

Thank you for not covering your cough, or washing your hands after blowing your nose, and thank you for not carrying a trial-size bottle of hand sanitizer with you on the plane. I realize that airline regulations now limit the amount of fluids passengers carry, and not carrying that hand sanitizer probably gave you more room for important things like cologne for your “business trip.”

I just wanted to thank you again for your generosity; it is not often that grownups remember to share.

Excuse me while I go blow by dose, and use my inhaler.

Sincerely, one half of the sleeping couple in row 7.