Monday, October 12, 2009

Beth, you've done it again...

Beth Moore you have once again chipped away at what's eating me.

Deep down in my heart of hearts, in the deep dark places of my soul, I am afraid that God is a taker and not a giver.

Beth, why is it that whatever I am feeling, comes out in your study. For instance; you say, "Sometimes when you want to go on the ride of your life with Jesus, you have to let go of where you are right now." (or somehing like that, ok, I'm not the fastest note-taker ever...) and this: "what is keeping us from the ride of our lives with God?

Ok, so, yes. I maybe having a hard time letting go of somethings. Well, like, income for instance, a house, schools for my kids...etc.

And another thing: Abraham didn't know beforehand that he wasn't going through with Isaac on the alter. But we do.

Hindsight is always 20/20. That's hard for me to put into would I have handled the situation? Probably not without much screaming and falling on my face before God, and whining, and pouting, and generally carrying on like a spoiled brat!

POW!! Thunk! Arrow, swift to the target. Bull's eye!

That's the problem right there. I'm afraid of the test. I'm afraid that God is a taker, not a giver. I'm afraid that the path He has called us to walk will require too much of me. Oh, my! There's another one! I'm afraid that I will be pulled, literally, out by the roots. Asked to leave home, asked to move, asked to downsize, asked to transition.

Why can't we just BE!! For goodness sake? Change is hard and I don't like it.

So, Beth, since you seem to have a twitter acount with God, ask Him what He's doing...'cause, I don't have a clue.


Carol said...

Give and take is a two way street my dear.
Your DH wants to serve God and as his spouse you have to be able to do so also, no matter what the circumstance. Many ways to help others only come through personal "refining fire" so to speak.
Hugs and best wishes from our end. conference talks. Go check them out you may find them interesting.

Shawn said...

Good to see that HE is "moving" and calling you to Himself, to His sweetness, however painful it may be at this time. Praying for your family. Blessings, Shawn <><

Bryan & Jessica said...

I'm glad you've found some refreshment. It's so easy to question God's hand in our lives and so hard to believe that He really cares for us when everything around us is seemingly falling apart. But He IS there and He DOES care. "Mat 6:31 Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?
Mat 6:32 (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things.
Mat 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
Mat 6:34 Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day [is] the evil thereof." I know it is easier said than done when the bills are piling up and the collectors are calling, but know that the Lord HAS heard your plea and He will take care of y'all. I promise you these are not platitudes, nor is it a generic response-for I've been where you are-still am in some respects, but things are finally looking up over here, and I'm quite sure that you are not far behind...this Army Chaplaincy thing is enough to drive any of us bonkers, but the Lord's hand is upon your family, and He will guide you through this if you keep your eyes upon Him. You know what's cool about focusing on the Lord? That when you are looking at Him, the drama of the world around you sorta fades to your peripheral vision-making it a lot easier to stop focusing on it. You and yours are in my heart and in my prayers. We love ya, sister. Hugs,
Jessica K.


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